Five Minutes
by Zenappa
Summary: Peggy Carter finally had everything that she wanted: a husband, a start at a new life, a family. Well, as soon as she got through her wedding ceremony, she would. Unfortunately, Loki proved for that to be not so easy for the agent. A Carterson one-shot.


**Five Minutes**

Loki was supposed to be happy.

He had a wife that loved him beyond eternity, he had made peace with the people that had hated him most, he had everything that he could have dreamed of, minus a throne naturally. And yet, the longer that he sat there, that happiness that was so evident and clear was fading away.

Because the fact of the matter was simple. Loki was _supposed_ to be happy. Loki was most certainly not feeling that way.

Especially today.

He had his tuxedo on that he reserved for special events, since funerals were becoming more and more common by the moment. Except for the fact that today was supposed to be a happy gathering. And yet, everyone seemed to be happy except for him. He tried to be happy, for her mostly, but the emotion refused to emit itself from his system. As much as he tried, nothing could possibly change the horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach.

Turning the paper over and over in his hands, he re-read the names on the invitation again, hoping that it was some sort of mistake. But no matter how many times he willed it so, not even magic would change the preprinted names on the card. Steve and Peggy Rogers. It didn't quite fit, at least not to him.

He sighed once more, running a hand through his own hair, placing the invitation and its envelope on the side table next to the bed. Resisting the urge to flop back against the pillows, Loki sat there for several moments, locked in a situation that he never thought he would be in. For the first time in a long time, he allowed for fear to creep back into his system.

Fear was his biggest weakness.

No, that was incorrect. Love was his biggest weakness and the fear of losing the ones that he loved - whether it be to death or someone else - was what was eating away at his system.

He tried to remind himself that it was due to his own actions that he pushed her away. She had returned to him multiple times, choosing him time and time again, and yet, he was afraid. He had allowed for fear to control his actions, and he had pushed her away, trying to convince himself that she was safer and better off without him. He returned to something that was familiar, that was safe, that was a lie.

He couldn't hide behind that lie anymore.

A loud clang from the master bathroom in his home, and Loki levitated about two feet off of the bed that he was sitting on. He held a hand to his chest, trying to steady his breathing.

"Is everything alright?" he found the words to call out, even though he still wasn't quite focused on present time. His mind was still stuck in the past, picturing what could have been.

"I'm fine!" came his reply, and he sunk back into the pillows of the bed.

Loki couldn't recall how long he had been sitting there, tracing the words of the invitation and staring off into space, his mind clearly somewhere else. He was oblivious to everything and anything that was occurring around him as his eyes lazily unfocused into a blur, his emerald gaze fading by the moment. He wasn't sure if he could go through with this.

"Loki?"

If he closed his eyes and succumbed to the darkness, perhaps he could forget that this event was occurring at all.

"Loki?"

Perhaps he could pretend that he was happy again.

"Loki?"

Perhaps he could pretend that he was in her arms again.

"Loki, what the hell!" A pair of hands shook his shoulders, jolting him out of his thoughts and back to the present. He groaned loudly, bending over and holding his head. As he blinked rapidly to regain his vision, he shook his head from side to side, sending the woman before him an apologetic expression.

"I am sorry," he said, his eyes trying their hardest to refocus in front of him.

At first, all he could see was blonde hair and then her sparkling blue eyes, before he could finally make out the remaining features of his wife. He swung his legs over the side of the bed as he refocused his attention, mashing his teeth together to stay alert to the situation at end.

"Loki," he heard a soft sigh as her hands caressed the sides of his face. "What happened?" The bed creaked as she sat down next to him slowly. There was no trying to fool her anymore; it had become clear that she realized the truth as well.

He didn't have to say another word. He glanced up at her with sad eyes, his once bright emerald gaze pained. "Illyana," he started to say but she silenced him with her lips on his. It was brief, just a moment where Loki didn't comprehend what was happening. But when she pulled away, there was no trace of sadness across her expression, just understanding.

"Please."

Both of their gazes darted to the invitation laying open on the side table and back to each other within a single second. There was nothing that they could have said to change the moment that was unfolding around them.

"You love her." It was a statement, not a question.

Surprise rang across Loki's face as he lifted his chin to look into Illyana's eyes. She gave him a sad reassuring smile. "Go get her," she whispered, slipping her hands into her husband's and squeezing them gently.

They both knew what this meant. They both knew that once Loki walked out this door, he wasn't going back. They both knew where his heart truly laid, and it wasn't with the woman that he married.

He was exactly five minutes early to the wedding.

It didn't take the god long to find out the room that she was in, having following the trail of distressed bridesmaids and flower girls. It didn't take long for him to conjure up a bouquet of roses, red like the lipstick she always donned, but it certainly took him long enough to gather up the nerve to open the unlocked door before him.

She was facing an open window, showing a beautiful picture of a princess wedding before her. No matter how the colors seemed to match perfectly with the sky, no matter how many familiar faces he could spy from the position that he was standing, no matter how gorgeous the wedding looked from this perspective, the only truly beautiful thing was standing right in front of him.

Her brown hair was pinned up, still visible through the translucent veil that cascaded down her back. The dress that she was wearing, as white as snow, seemed to blend in with her pale skin, draping off her shoulders and falling down to the ground as a trail. But when he caught a glimpse of her face in the reflection of the window, it was saddened, almost as if she didn't want to go through with this promise. And yet, she was still the most stunning thing he had seen.

"Peggy," was all he said, but he could see the muscles that covered her open shoulders immediately tightening.

It took her a few minutes for her to turn around with a solemn expression on her face. "Loki?" she questioned.

He removed his hands from behind his back, revealing that his hands were full of the red roses that he was able to conjure up with his magic. "Five minutes, that's all I ask for."

"Five minutes-" she cut herself off, shaking her head. Shock rang clear across her face as she took a step backwards, running her palms down the side of her wedding dress. "No Loki, you cannot just walk in seconds before I am going to get _married_, it doesn't work like this."

Loki, however, had not come this far for a resounding no. He was a determined man to begin with, and with Illyana's words almost sealing his fate, he wasn't going to walk away so easily this time. He only wished that he had realized this sooner.

"I only want to talk," he reassured. "And if you do not want that, I will go." He paused, nodding slowly. "Besides, if you feel the need to convince yourself that you are ready, perhaps you are not as ready as you claim to be."

A look of clear disbelief crossed her face before she opened and closed her mouth without any words. "Five minutes," she managed to say. "Make them count."

Loki cleared his throat. He hadn't really thought this one through as he figured that she would have denied him the chance to even speak. "Very well," he took a deep breath and straightened his tie, trying not to look as flushed as he felt. He took another step forward not a moment later and handed her the bouquet of roses. "These are for you, obviously," he stammered, trying to find the words to say. His silver tongue never seemed to work around her. "You look absolutely stunning, by the way."

"Five minutes, Loki."

He nodded again, wringing his hands together and glancing up towards the ceiling. He sucked in another huge breath before redirecting his attention towards her. "Right," he said. "The thing is, I don't want you to get married."

She opened her mouth to protest, but Loki wasn't going to let this conversation end so quickly. He held up one finger, stopping her words before they appeared. "Ah, give me a minute," he interrupted, and she fell silent a second later.

"You see, while you have been here in a flourishing relationship, and you have been preparing for your wedding, I have been miserable," he said slowly. "I thought that as long as you were happy, I would be happy, but I'm not happy. I cannot be happy, believe me, I am trying. I thought it was some sort of depression, and that it would pass, but it hasn't. It wasn't until today that I realized the source of my sadness… was you."

Peggy glanced up at him with an expression distressed beyond belief. He could see her chest heaving up and down with every breath she took. "What?" she stammered.

He knelt down in front of her, shaking his head as he slipped his hands in hers. "You could get married today, and you could live the life that is planned out for you now." He paused, placing his forehead in the middle of her palms. "Or."

"Peggy," he exhaled. "I love you, and I will spend the rest of my life trying to prove that to you in every way I know how. You could get married today, but understand that I…" He broke off once more. "You would miss out on something you will not ever regret."

Loki swallowed the lump in his throat slowly, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. He hated the way that she made him feel, so vulnerable inside, and yet, he knew that opening that side of him… to her… was the best thing that could happen.

"And what would that be?" Peggy questioned, and Loki tried not to pay attention to the way she was choking back her own tears.

He stood up, removing his presence from hers, leaving behind a single golden necklace with an emerald stone sitting in the middle of the piece of jewelry. "That would be me," he exhaled loudly, putting on a brave smile.

There was a long pause, as Peggy ran her fingertips across the necklace in her hands. Her eyes flickered from his own to the door and back again, and Loki knew his point had been made. "Illyana?" she asked slowly as if she was afraid of the answer.

"She knew there was somewhere else I would rather be," he chuckled sadly. "With someone else. Frankly, it felt wrong… after a while… as if I were cheating on her with you in my mind from the very beginning." It was the least he could say on the matter. He had been afraid, he had wanted to protect her, but she never needed protection… and he realized that too late. "I'm yours for the taking," he said slowly. "If you would."

"And this?" she asked, gesturing to the necklace.

"That stone is a precious Asgardian gem. It… it leads you to the thing you want the most."

She tilted her head to one side, frowning slightly. "So why give it to me?"

"It was mine," he admitted. "But I figured, no matter where I am or what I do, it will only lead me to you. So it was yours from the very beginning."

Peggy sighed once again, placing a hand across her chest, feeling the metal texture under her fingers. But still, she kept silent. His five minutes were running short.

"Peggy, come with me."

She shook her head, refusing to give in. "Loki, it is hardly the right time-" she protested.

"There will never be a right time," he said. "I do not know what lays ahead for us, nor do I know how this will work, but I know that I love you. I know that all I want is you, and I will do everything for you. Come with me, Pegs."

She opened her mouth to respond, but again, he cut her off. "There is no need to answer me now," he said with a smile. "But please, consider it."

He sauntered back towards the door, biting his lip as the weight was lifted off of his shoulders. Loki knew that he had done the right thing, whether it was probable or not, and that would never fade away. He turned at the last minute, nodding towards her once more.

"You really do look beautiful today, Peggy."

And then he was gone.

Loki had a single idea of where to go. His home with Illyana was not an option anymore. Even if Peggy didn't give him a second chance or third chance or whatever it had become, he couldn't return to his wife. He had left her because he was in love with another woman. That wasn't the best grounds to come back to. He couldn't go into the wedding itself, especially after what just happened. He wasn't sure that he was going to be able to handle the pain that occurred if she denied his request. He really only had one choice.

He needed the chance to get away, to some place where he could never be found… unless someone knew where he was.

And with Peggy in his mind, he created the island.

He stayed in the cabin formed from his mind and the magic in his body, for several minutes, trying his hardest to stay calm and wait the hours away. Except Loki was not a very patient man.

The knock on the door made him paranoid, unsure of what to expect. He came here to be alone, to forget what had just happened, because if she had chosen him, she would have been here already. When he opened the door, however, he knew that forgetting would be impossible.

"Peggy?"

"I didn't do it."

He paused where he stood, biting his lip and tiling his head to one side. However, if he wanted to say anything, she wouldn't let him.

"You see," she continued. "As I was walking down the aisle, I began to realize that I wasn't going to be happy unless I was happy with you. I realized that I would rather spend my life doing something worthwhile than live in regret. I realized that I was willing to leave it all to be with you. I realized that I was madly in love with you, and that you were, in fact, what I want most."

Loki stood paralyzed in shock for several minutes, before a shadow of a smirk crossed his face, taking in the words that she was saying. She was in love with him. All of that hadn't had been for nothing.

"I knew you would come around," he finally said.

She rolled her eyes exasperatedly. "Oh shut up," she laughed out loud, feeling the freedom for the first time in a long time.

And then she wrapped her arms around her neck and yanked him down to her level, crashing her lips against his own. He let his hands fall to her waist as he immediately responded passionately. They stayed like that for several moments, not daring to move from their position for fear that it would blink and be over once more.

However, this time was different. This time, Loki had no plans of ever letting go of her again.


End file.
